All my life I have been guarding my heart. I built walls around it to try to protect myself from being hurt. I was so full of fear. I lost both of my parents and I told myself that people who I loved would always leave. To protect myself, I was too afraid to get close with anyone.
Since being in recovery I have learned how to give and receive love. It no longer seems dangerous. And the joy love brings is a feeling I can’t describe. Learning how to open myself up to the love that surrounded me was one of the things I had to do – despite my fear.
I have learned that being loved and giving love is a rewarding experience. It no longer seems like a risk to me but instead an opportunity.
“I’ve sat a while
And thought a lot about love
Over all other desires
It is above
Yet one thing I can’t
Get over is fear
Unable to commit to a future unclear
With my heart on the line
Too much is at stake
I’m afraid that’s a risk
I’m just not willing to take.”
